During the Christmas holiday, my wife and I attended the Onething Conference hosted by the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. It was an excellent conference and while I was there, I received another picture from the Lord. By the way, this sort of encounter is not my typical experience. In fact, I have rarely received dreams/visions from the Lord, so this is new for all of us. 🙂
In any case, I forgot the lead in for this particular vision, but I remember standing before God knowing that I needed His heart if I was to walk into my new role as Senior Pastor and do it well. So I took out my heart and handed it to Him (it is amazing how natural it is to do such things in dreams). Then I held out my hands to receive His. He took out His heart and put it in my outstretched hand. Have you ever had someone dump into your hands something that was unexpectedly heavy? That is what this was like, His head felt like it was a couple hundred pounds and I knew I was going to drop it – so in slow motion I dove, trying to get both hands under His heart so that I wouldn’t drop it.
I ended up facedown on the floor, His heart cupped in both hands, but because of the weight of His heart and the impact I had on the ground, I knew that my hands were broken. I couldn’t stand up and I was painfully aware that I needed to have His heart inside of me. So, with my hands anchored in place by His heart, I pulled myself up and over it, so that His heart went into my chest. And I lay there for a few mintues overwhelmed. I eventually began to wonder, “How am I going to get up? I don’t think I can stand with this heavy weight.” It was then that I felt Jesus’ arms slide under my body and He picked me up. He craddeled me against His chest and began walking. As I looked up at Him I saw Him looking down at me. Then He said,
“The only thing you need to concern yourself with is carrying My heart well. I will take you wherever you need to go. The only way you can carry My heart is by letting Me carry you.”
That was the end of this particular vision, but it has stayed with me the longest. I frequently think of my broken hands, symbolizing, I think, the sacrificial life that Amy and I are called to. I also think of Jesus’ hands, broken and pierced on the Cross, knowing that it wasn’t nails that kept Him there, but love. 2012 is promising to be an eventful year, I am excited to see what else the Lord has in store.